STATUS: Thursday, June 16th

The Daily Report

Well, yesterday was not a great day by most measurements. I was exhausted, emotionally down, and having some cognitive issues in the early afternoon. When my writing alarm went off at 4:30, though, I sat down and wrote 2,000+ words for the next chapter of Tales of MU.

Taking a moment to note that I’m taking a week or maybe two off from the satirical posts. It’s not that I don’t believe there is a place for levity in mourning, nor that I don’t think there’s a place for humor in disarming hatred and bigotry, because I do. It’s just hard for me to sustain that vibe for the length of a longer piece right now. Trying to write a Sad Puppy-style satire in the wake of the Pulse massacre is proving especially difficult. The hatred that kills those in the LGBT+/queer communities has far less to do with politically-motivated terrorists overseas than it does with the attitudes at home that constantly position us as other, as both an existential threat and a passive, powerless focus for fear, anger, and resentment.

Mr. Upjohn’s post-con report from WisCon is still forthcoming; it’s evolved and grown a few times since the con actually ended as I took reality onboard , which once again has made parody seem tame. When actual flesh and blood con attendants are decrying the “dystopian” tape lines designating travel lanes on the crowded party floor, I clearly need to step up the game.

The State of the Me

A little the worse for wear. Yesterday I was exhausted from what I thought was just lack of sleep and heat. Today, after a solid night’s sleep and with an air conditioned office(! Thank you, Amazon wishlist gift-giver!)… I’m less tired but still exhausted. Joint pain and muscle pain. This plus a scratchy throat is telling me that I might have caught what’s been floating around the house.

Financial State

Still pretty much the same as before? In a few weeks when July starts, I should have my biggest ever Patreon payday. Until then I’m pretty close to broke, in a household with a budget that’s stretched pretty thin at this point. I’d really love to close out my WorldCon fundraiser before June’s end; even if it does not immediately change my financial status, knowing that I don’t have to worry about how to pay for things come August will lessen my anxiety around money.

It was pointed out to me today that I can put gift cards on my Amazon wishlist, so I did. This could be a way for people who want to help buy the pricier items (like the A/C, or the futon mattress I have listed) without having to come up with the whole sticker price themselves.

Of course, they could always just send money, but there are interesting psychological whatsits at work around crowdfunding. In the past week, someone bought me an $80 piece of wearable computing technology and someone else bought me $130 home appliance. In the same time frame, I got less than $40 in tips and contributions to my travel fund. And I’m not complaining about the form the generosity took, just analyzing it. The watch and A/C unit are both already improving my work life immeasurably.

I’ve had an appreciable number of people over the years flat-out tell me they won’t tip a creator or pledge on Patreon because they can’t wrap their mind around it as a model for commerce, but they’re happy to buy gifts because that’s something they understand.

So maybe the gift card thing will pan out? I can certainly buy enough household staples and personal essentials that it would be worth it. Money is the most fungible commodity imaginable, so if I get $25 for the household to spend on Amazon, that can be $25 freed up for elsewhere.

Plans For Today

It’s taken me basically two hours to even put together this post, so… not much? I have a chapter of Tales of MU to post today. My plans were to both finish it up with a coat of polish and write the first chapter for next week, but I’m not sure I’ll get to the second part of that. On the other hand, yesterday I felt as bad or worse, and I still wrote today’s chapter.

Getting ahead of today: my overall goal for this week was to write four chapters over the five days, so that I can get a week ahead. I have no intention of trying to keep up that kind of pace, because I’ve tried that and even with the understanding of “I’m working ahead, so it’s okay if I don’t hit the mark”, it was pretty brutal. But if I’m a week ahead, I can write two chapters a week and just maintain that padding, and if I occasionally have a kick-awesome week and write a third or fourth chapter, that will hopefully make up for the weeks where I miss one.